What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
