goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
