Just fell off a train. Bad.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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