we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Randomize
