if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize