dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I think people are normalizing furries
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
