I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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