DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize