I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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