just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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