I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
We got so high we made milksteak
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
