I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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