I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
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