just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
