Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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