Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
