I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
