I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
