This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
