im gay
i know
yea but for you.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
