haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
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