So drunk its hurt
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
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