So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
i think i just lost a toe
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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