Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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