i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
