New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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