worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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