I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize