Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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