69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
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