I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize