Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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