I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Randomize
