:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
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