i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Randomize
