DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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