He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
