You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
