I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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