4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I use my feet as sexual weapons
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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