I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
wakey wakey hands off snakey
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize
