He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
