just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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