We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
