VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Randomize
