he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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