Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize
