what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
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