I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
