Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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