Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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